41 weeks

I have gone past my due date once in my previous 3 births- 3 days past (she was born the early morning on day 4) my due date. I am currently a week past my due date with sweet Fischer boy. He is apparently either very stubborn or just very laid back and in no hurry. I see a group of midwives at Vanderbilt and as long as He remains healthy and I remain healthy I will be allowed to go to 42 weeks. I am not going to lie. Going this far past my due date, especially with my 4th baby (my last came on his due date)has not been easy- in fact it has been emotionally draining as well as physically exhausting. I have had moments where I have been in tears and moments where I have been blissful as I get to keep my baby boy all to myself for a while longer. More then anything though I have grown. Growing physically indeed- I never imagined my belly SO big. But more then that growing in my faith. I am humbled by the amazing support God has given me these last few weeks, I will not try to state names because I will over look someone. I have had a specific friend who is the one person not scared to say to me "its okay to cry and be upset because yes you are miserable. But then when we get off the phone you get yourself under control and be a wife and mom and continue to grow that baby" to some that may seem harsh but at the time it was what I needed. I have a friend who has sent daily texts checking in, listening to me complain and even though she has never had children herself she sympathizes with me. I have a friend who has walked with me over and over with her 5 children and my 3, and even though it is a bit chaotic she walks faithfully every time I have asked. She reminded me this morning that I do not want an induction and that the only reason I would be doing it (if he is healthy and I am healthy) is because I am looking for an out or trying to make it easier on others, and ultimately I would regret it. Most of all she said how proud she was of me for remaining strong, she is amazing. I have a friend who has helped me do exercises to better position Fischer and reminded me that this time of waiting could be a powerful time to grow in my faith. a time to cling to God and trust HIS PLAN and HIS TIMING and I could either waste this time complaining or I could turn those complaints to glorifying God. I don't want to waste this precious time on complaints. God knows when I cant take anymore- He knows when Fischers birthday will be and whether or not He will come on his own or if it will end in an induction both are out of my control. My dear sister and sister in law have texted me daily encouragements and love. Today one of the preschool directors sisters came in (she is a massage therapist) and worked pressure points that are supposed to help encourage labor, while others generously played with and watched my children. My whole mommy group has reminded me I am STRONG and that I can rely on Christ through this. I am humbled to say the least. Humbled by Gods grace to grow my faith through pregnancy and humbled by those he has surrounded me with in order to encourage me to grow. I am incredibly blessed by Kevin. The amount of things he has done in addition to his own job is amazing. He helps me with kids and cleaning. He makes me smile when I am exhausted. He rubs my back and holds my hand late at night when I can't sleep. He prays both with and for me. He is my best friend, I couldn't keep going without him. God is growing us closer, God is reminding the blessing I have in my husband. We go tomorrow for a non stress test and if everything is ok and we do not have him over the weekend we will have an ultrasound on Monday to check him. If everything continues and no baby is born by the end of next week we will have an induction. Please join us in praying Fischer stays healthy. Please join us in thanking God for his graciousness to grow us. Pray Fischer comes sooner then later. Pray God gives me peace no matter what, and teaches me patience. Pray for a healthy delivery for both Fischer and I and a good easy adjustment when he is born.