exhausted momma...

We are coming out of the cloud of our 1st phase of adoption. The haze of early fundraising, the phase of heavy paper work, the phase chasing around town to get medical exams, passports, finger prints, background checks, and psych evals. This last few months I don't know that I have ever been so exhausted. Every minute I have something to do, or should be doing. Either I'm at preschool, running kiddos somewhere, household chores, and then in my few minutes of non committed time I'm chasing paperwork around. But it is paying off, we are on the edge of finishing it up. Adoption is fUll of unexpected. That is what I've been told from the begining. and they weren't lieing. Here's an example. We needed local background checks. I was told to go the local city police department. So off I went. My little duckies following behind me. We were sent to 3 different offices. Then finally told they "no longer do those here". Back to the mini we traveled. I texted my AMAZING caseworker and she got right on it. After calling she discovered the police department no longer did them. So we were sent to the Rutherford county jail. While waiting for my background report a whole line of men from the jail came out, orange jump suits and all. and you know what my boys did, they high five them. The whole line of fugitives. Oh me. all I could do was laugh, I hope their day was brightened. When I went to get fingerprinted, my babe's played peek a boo with a man in an office who was obviously busy but sweet enough to entertain them so I could finish the task at hand. When I needed to have a drug screen I wasn't allowed to take the kiddos into the bathroom with me, so a nurse stood with them and played to keep them calm and entertained. The countless times I've visited the post office I have been greeted by the same kind women-always quick to ask me about our adoption and even quicker to remind me God is in control and that she is praying. While getting my passport we waited over 2 hours, the kids were a wreck but when we got in the office she made them smile and laugh and gave them crayons and paper for distractions. You see adoption can be lonely. So very isolating. Your friends are pregnang. They are feeling and knoWing and growing their child, and our child is far away, and we don't know her, or even if she is born yet. Yet we are fightiNg for her. Fighting to finance her homecoming, and by the grace of God and kindness of people we are. We are fighting the nay sayers, those who think we are crazy. Those who think we have "enough" kids. Those who think we are selfish to adopt. We are fighting the busyness of our schedules to finish paperwork. Appointments. And deadlines. Losing sleep as we stay up late to do trainings. And we don't even know her yet. But oh how we love her. We crave to know her, crave to touch her, kiss her and call her ours. God is growing us through this. Every time the devil beats us down the holy spirit moves and God's presence is seen again. I don't really know the ppint of this post, I guess it comes from exhaustion ☺